I am spending my child support on dildos
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Don't EVER smell your tampon
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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