Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
