Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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