i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
