So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Sober January is a disaster.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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