belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
