"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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