woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
