Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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