My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
