Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
