so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
