My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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