I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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