It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
