I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize