dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize
