I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
he fucked my hip out of place.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
