i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize