He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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