So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
