i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
