the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
