I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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