idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
