TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
