at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
