oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
