Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
