people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Randomize
