That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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