I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
