Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
