your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
