Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
