I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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