nut hugger
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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