That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Randomize
