so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
