butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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