? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
