Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
