I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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