I want to make a zoo with you.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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