did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
