I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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