Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
there was a trapeze. enough said
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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