I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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