i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize