I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
