so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize