'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
